Northrop New Year's News 2023

Northrop New Year’s News 2023

Dear Family and Friends, 

JOY. Is it hard to find this season? I know I find myself checking off the to-do list, expecting joy when it’s done. But, it’s never really done. The laundry or dishes can be done and then there’s a sock on the floor, or a fork in the sink. Is our joy that easily undone? I ran across a poem a couple of weeks ago called “Joy Chose You.”  “Joy cares nothing about your messy home or your bank balance or your waistline. Joy is supposed to slither through the cracks of your imperfect life. You cannot invite her, you can only be ready when she appears.” Our hope this season is you can recognize the joy that sneaks into your life, especially the joy you didn’t plan for or work for. See the joy of a random text or an especially great cup of coffee or conversation or a puzzle piece that unexpectedly fits. Wherever you find it, embrace it - ready or not. We’ve also included bits of advice for anyone interested whether or not you want it. :) 

Gabe

Gabe finished his first year at the University of Minnesota and is halfway through his second majoring in Computer Science. He loves the U and we enjoy having him relatively close to us. He’s had challenging classes, made good friends, learned the public transit system, and visited museums. He has been dating his girlfriend, Katrina (a journalism major), for over a year and they love thrifting and used book stores. During the summer, he worked a lot at Menards and facetimed Katrina in Germany where she lives.  He’s excited for his trip to spend time with her and her family after Christmas. This year Gabe is living off campus, attending Gopher Football games, other sporting events, concerts, and of course studying. 

Advice: Texting seems to be the best way to communicate with your big kids (or Snapchat, but I don't have that).

Ben

Ben is 18 and will graduate this spring with honors. Last spring he achieved some goals in track and field and has bigger goals for his senior season. He advanced to Section in the discus and placed third. The top 2 advance to State, so you can guess what his goal for 2024 might be. His favorite classes this year are ceramics and foods. Ben was a cross country captain this fall. He’s working on his gainz (muscle and weight gain for shot put and discus and the weight room) so it was a bit more of a challenge. As our only senior, he was a good leader for our young team. Ben got a job this summer at Arby’s and has been a valuable worker. He works about 20 hours a week and enjoys eating the 50% discount on food. He’s currently benching 260# and is still kind and caretaking to those around him. We’ve visited a few colleges and he’s been accepted to all five that he’s applied to. The top choices so far are UW-Stout and Mankato with a few left to visit. Advice: Let your kids decide who they want to be. Support them in their passions with unwavering enthusiasm. 

Lyndee

Lyndee will celebrate her 17th birthday in just a couple of weeks. Last spring she qualified for Section in the shot put, discus, and two relays.  She was part of the 4x100 that narrowly missed qualifying for state and ran the 4x200 in prelims but not finals. This fall she played volleyball as a middle hitter and was great at supporting her teammates on the court. She plays trumpet in the band. She’s an excellent student who works hard and diligently studies for tests. She worked at the athletic club this summer, tried to continue through the fall, but realized that she needed some downtime with school and sports taking priority. Lyndee is a starter for the basketball team and is proving to be stronger and more confident this season. It is so fun to watch her on the court. She loves hanging out with friends and shopping. 

Advice: Feed your teenagers and then they are more amenable to talking. Try not to coach them in the car or at the dinner table, even when you have knowledge to share.

Matt and Amy

Parenting, teaching, and coaching dominate our lives. (Matt wants you to know that he can bench 300# and that Ben is still working to beat his old man). Matt - still the tallest in our family - started year 27 and I - now the shortest in the family - started year 25 this fall, in physical education and 6th grade respectively. I love teaching Minnesota History and learning new things about our beautiful state all the time. Our students challenge us to be our best and we hope we do the same for them. This fall we were busy coaching cross country and football and this spring Matt and I are both looking forward to track and field. Both of our teams are hoping to replicate the successes of last spring. Our girls and boys teams are so fun to coach and we love to help them achieve their goals. We are surrounded with a talented and enthusiastic coaching staff that makes our jobs so much easier. 

Advice as teachers: Keep electronics out of kids’ hands as long as possible. It’s one thing we think we did right as parents. 

Travel

We traveled mostly to Granite Falls this year to visit my dad and Karla. Some trips were out and back in a day when we could squeeze them in between the kids’ schedules. My dad remains in the care center in Granite where they enjoy his humor. My husband is amazing at helping him in and out of the house when we get to bring him home for a day. Karla is doing better after having stents put in last winter while in Arizona. 

Advice: Ask your parents for their stories and write them down. 

Our biggest trip happened this summer when Matt, Ben, and Lyndee flew to California to see our nieces in musical theater productions and Gabe and I met them later in Maui! It was an amazing opportunity to travel to Maui with Seth, Kaela and the girls. We spent a week enjoying great meals, sunsets, snorkeling, beach walks, a luau, and so many laughs with them and our kids. What a gift to be able to experience all of that with them. 

Advice: Appreciate the generosity of others, even when you don’t think you deserve it.

Pets

Here’s the 2023 rundown–Dash - 12.5 years old still thinks he’s small (he’s not) and loves to cuddle. He tolerates Goldie trying to play with him, but then will escape upstairs when he is tired. He cannot hear us when we call, so when he gets the urge to wander, we are going with him, steering him back like sheepherders with a stick - tapping him on the side to tell him where he needs to go. Cat #5, Sunny and Cat #6, Luna aka Chubs and Tubs are getting good at mouse hunting and sometimes leave me presents on the garage steps. Sunny disappeared for a week before Maui and reappeared in a culvert right before we left.   Goldie (Marigold) - 1.5 years old - Yellow Lab. She is so naughty as evidenced by the number of sticks of butter she has stolen off the counter and the uncooked cinnamon rolls she has eaten. She got a D on her behavior report card from the vet who said she might need to be sedated next time she comes in. (She is definitely NOT a fan of getting her temperature taken). She likes to see out the windows so she jumps on top of the dining room table, the tall kitchen table, and her kennel. She is so cute. She may be a good dog someday. Just not yet. 

Advice: Don’t assume your big dogs are outside dogs. Choose the most mellow puppy, not the one who is jumping all over you. If you have mice in your garage, get cats. 

We hope you find joy in the small unexpected spaces in your life. Look for it. Happy New Year! 

Love, Matt & Amy, Gabe, Ben, Lyndee, Dash, Goldie, Sunny, and Luna

Northrop New Year's News 2022

Northrop New Year’s  News 2022

Dear Family and Friends, 

As we were sitting on the couch bemoaning the near end of our winter break, Matt remarked, “We just didn’t DO anything.” We meant to do things. We planned to go places. But then weather and illness thwarted those plans. As a family, we are so used to being busy that NOT being busy makes us feel at loose ends, untethered, and not in a good way. When Matt made his remark, I thought for a while and then I said, “We did do something. We rested.” Weirdly, resting feels unproductive, uncomfortable. We are realizing that we are finally coming down after the last two years of coaching and teaching during a pandemic. When you are in it, you just do whatever you need to do in order to parent, educate, and coach. It seemed like our brains and emotions were constantly in flux and in need of quick pivots. One quote that illustrates how I felt often in the last two years is from Frozen II: “When one can see no future, all one can do is the next right thing.” Many times throughout 2022, I leaned on these words to help me with decisions and not extrapolate every situation out too far. Transitions in life dominated our year - confirmation, graduation, and our oldest heading to college. My dad also transitioned first to an assisted living facility and now to a care center. It wasn’t easy, nor what my dad would choose, but with the help of my amazing, caretaking husband, my sisters, my aunt and uncles, Karla, and my dear friend, Cheri, he is safe and healthy. We just had to focus on doing the “next right thing.” My grumpy bear dad isn’t always happy, but we are grateful for the care he is getting. 

Gabe

Gabe finished out his senior basketball season hitting some 3s and dunking in warmups (this earned him his one and only Technical which he says was worth it). He was captain for the track and field team, and again had many successes. Gabe earned All Conference for the 2nd year, advanced to the section earning points in the discus (4th) and high jump (3rd). He cleared 6-2 this year, though that height eluded him at the Section meet  after hitting his head on the standard while attempting qualifying height. Gabe worked at Menards on weekends and throughout the summer. He graduated as Valedictorian of his class and gave a speech at graduation. I was thinking that he probably could have said, “This is probably the most that you all have heard me speak.” His excellent grades and great test scores earned him some local scholarships and two merit based scholarships at the University of Minnesota. Gabe has a job on campus in his dorm as a computer center coordinator which matches well with his Computer Science major. He enjoyed attending the Gopher home football games and is proficient at using the public transit system for adventures with his friends. He also makes good use of the fitness center on campus and is in a movie club. We are thankful for his smooth transition to college life, though we miss his quiet presence in our daily endeavors.

Ben

Ben is 17 and he still loves his VR gaming world and monetized his youtube channel, so that gives him a little bit of income. Ben passed his driver’s test and is enjoying the 1998 green Blazer that he got from my dad and Karla. He made a beautiful cutting board in Woods class and says his Global Studies class was his favorite. Ben played his last basketball games this summer and made the decision to focus on school, continue to weight train (current max 215#), and apply for a job. It’s been good for him to not have that obligation this winter. We know BB can be a grind, especially when you don’t love it. I saw a quote that goes along with this, too: “Parent the child you have, not the one you were.” Ben did well as a thrower this year in track and field, placing in the Section in the discus. He enjoyed another season of cross country where he earned a spot in the team’s top 10 and plans to run a half marathon with me this summer.  We were very proud when he was inducted into the Minnesota Honor Society in November. Ben enjoyed being an ensemble member in the musical last spring and entertains us at choir concerts as well. Just tonight, we looked at him and thought that he may just be the tallest kid in our family now, surpassing Gabe, but not yet Matt.

Lyndee

Lyndee will celebrate her golden birthday on the 16th of January. She played both varsity and JV in basketball last season and is continuing to work on her skills as a post and as an outside shooter. This winter she is working on staying aggressive while controlling her fouls.  She did very well in track and field last spring and advanced to Section in both the shot put and the discus and was an alternate on our state 4x100 team. Lyndee played with an AAU basketball team this spring and summer and enjoyed getting to know new players and new coaches. This fall she played JV volleyball as a middle hitter and supported the varsity team as a bench player. Lyndee still loves TV and watching shows as her downtime. Along with Ben, she was a part of the ensemble cast in the spring musical and will be in this spring’s musical as well.  She plays trumpet in the band. She’s an excellent student, and though grades and tests can be very stressful, she presses on to maintain her 4.0. 

Matt and Amy

One of the highlights of our year was a trip to Arizona in March with our friends to visit my dad and Karla. We hiked and ate great food and had a wonderful time. A month later, Matt flew down and drove them back to Minnesota. I knew it before, but my husband is the best. He has shown so much kindness and compassion to my parents and to me, both in times of crisis and in our day in and day out. In our regular lives, parenting, teaching, and coaching dominate all of our waking moments (and some of our sleeping ones, too). I am thankful for my work family and the great people with whom I get to coach.  Matt returned to coach football this fall, and was still able to catch Lyndee’s VB games and some of Ben’s CC meets. Completing my 15th year of coaching cross country was rewarding and two of my athletes advanced to the State meet. We are now in the thick of basketball season and I am once again a parent in the stands and not coaching from the bench. It was a decision that I know is better for our family, but I still miss the interactions with the athletes during practices and games. As parents, we know that we are not easy for our kids to have in the stands. We are coaches, so we try to coach. And our kids resoundingly reject our efforts. We are working on being better sports (and school) parents and our kids might tell you that we need to work harder.  Matt and I are both looking forward to track and field this year where we CAN (kind of) coach them. Both of our teams are hoping to replicate the successes of last spring. The boys three peated as Sub-Section, Section, True Team Section, and Conference Champions. The girls were Sub-Section Champions, True Team Section Runners-up, and Conference Runners-up. Our girls and boys teams are so fun to coach and we love to help them achieve their goals. We are surrounded with a talented and enthusiastic coaching staff that makes our jobs so much easier.

Travel

In March we drove out to Maryland to stay with Chris, Bree, and family. We had a wonderful time sightseeing in DC, shopping, hiking, playing lawn games, and just hanging out with the family. At the end of May, we were so grateful to our family and friends who came to Gabe’s graduation celebration. It was a raucous houseful that was also joyous and we felt the love all around. Our summer trip this year to California was filled with good hiking, pool time, working in the woods, shopping, San Francisco, Stranger Things, wood fired pizza, and of course, family. 

Pets

Here’s the 2022 rundown–Dash - 11.5 years old still thinks he’s small (he’s not) and loves to cuddle. He enjoyed some time as an only dog in June and now is tolerating his much younger sister. After becoming an inside dog, the wanderlust still strikes him, but only once this year was he missing for any length of time. Does anyone remember the children’s book Harry the Dirty Dog? That would be Dash after his adventure. We’ve learned that when he doesn’t want to come inside, he pretends like he can’t hear us and ambles off into the woods.  When he is ready to come in, he peers up at us with a look that says, “Oh! There you are!” Cat #5, Sunny and Cat #6, Luna are finally getting along and even snuggling together when it’s cold. They’ve both put on a bit of weight and now are affectionately called Chubs and Tubs. Goldie (Marigold) - 7 months - Yellow Lab. We forgot. We forgot how much work a puppy can be, especially now that our kids sleep in. Puppies do not sleep in. Puppies are up A LOT in the night, (though she is sleeping through the night now). Puppies pee in the house. We often say to her, “You’re lucky you’re cute.” And she is VERY cute. She will be a good dog, someday, just not yet. 

We hope that you are better at resting than we are (or at least more comfortable with it). We hope that if you find yourself feeling untethered, you can simply do the next right thing. We are grateful that you are in our lives. We hope you find joy in doing the things you love in 2023. Happy New Year! 

Love, Matt & Amy, Gabe, Ben, Lyndee, Dash, Goldie, Sunny, and Luna

 

Northrop New Year's News 2021

 Northrop New Year’s  News 2021

Dear Family and Friends, 

Over the course of our lives, there have been certain “sweet spots” where everything feels right, or as right as it can be in our world. For me, it was the first year of college or that first few years of marriage. Then, it was when we had one baby who just came everywhere with us. Next, when our youngest hit Kindergarten and all the kiddos were in school. The next ten years have been up and down, non-stop parenting and working, and now we find ourselves in perhaps another sweet spot. With three high schoolers who are athletes, musicians, students, and more - the downtime moments feel few and far between. However, we know that the constant movement, buzz of activities, and full calendars will not last forever, so we remind ourselves to enjoy the down moments in each day when we can connect or reconnect with our kids, our families, our friends, and each other.  Sometimes, it’s during a car ride, a bus ride, a facetime, a text, or time in the gym. Other times, it’s watching a funny show or a brief snuggle on the couch. In all of these times, we attempt to meet the moments with gratitude.

Gabe

Our G man spent his 18th birthday with cousins in San Francisco. He got to set the agenda - Japan Town, Alcatraz, and Ghirardelli Square.  He’s very into Manga and has accrued quite a collection of books from Barnes and Noble and other online book sellers. They have to be in perfect condition for his collection though, so we know the UPS store and the Amazon return process very well by now. He played JV basketball last year, and this fueled him to work on his foot quickness and strength for track and field.  Both track and field and basketball saw trips to the ER for stitches on his head. Despite that, he earned all conference honors for track and field and advanced to the Section meet in both high jump and discus. After clearing 6-1 in the high jump, he’s hoping for 6-4 in the 2022 season. His team also did great things, but we’ll cover that in Matt’s section. He still works at Menards in order fulfillment, reads a lot, and works on his computer. Gabe excels in the classroom, maintaining his 4.0,  and earned an excellent ACT score, so that makes the college search interesting. His top picks are currently University of Minnesota - Twin Cities and NDSU, with a possible major in computer science. Iowa State is also in the running after getting a scholarship award letter yesterday. Mom and Dad’s alma mater was “a solid 5th place (out of 6)” when we visited this summer.  People ask how it will be next year when he’s at college. For me, it’s like when we dropped him off at Kindergarten. There weren’t any tears, just excitement knowing that he was so ready for that next step. Of course we will miss him (and yes, I’ll cry at graduation), but we are both thankful to live in a world of facetime and texting so that we can get our Gabe fix when we need it. 

Ben

Ben is 16 and we think the thing he loves most in the world is his VR gaming world and his youtube channel. He’s worked hard to fill the channel with RecRoom tutorials and challenges. Check it out at Rock Lobster. He was confirmed this spring and it was great to have a celebration with family and friends. Ben does not have his driver’s license yet, partly due to the limited testing openings, but is looking forward to taking his test (again) in March. His favorite class currently is Peak Performance with Mr. Northrop and Foods class. Last spring, he enjoyed welding (but not the burn hole on his phone made from a spark through his pants pocket). Ben also did well as a thrower this year in track and field and is looking forward to the shot and discus again. Mom might make him join the distance group, since this fall he elected to run cross country instead of play football. Dad wasn’t too thrilled, but Mom loved having him on the team (except he’s not the best listener to his coach). He ran very well, dropping his 5K time by MINUTES by the end of the season and earning an alternate spot for the section meet. He’s using his newfound swiftness to make some smooth moves on the court as a big man. Busy with three sports, he doesn’t have much time for work, but is still employed at Panther Pals when school is not in session. Ben, who loves to perform in the choir, will be an ensemble cast member in the musical this March. He also loves hanging out with his friends on their various adventures of Marvel movies, nerf gun action, and cosplay at Nerdin’outCon. 

Lyndee

Lyndee will be 15 in just two weeks. She is now taller than me and much stronger as a HS athlete than I ever was. She did very well in track and field last spring and was our top thrower. She advanced to section in the shot put as an 8th grader and is looking forward to next spring as well. Lyndee played VB this summer and made the JV team this fall. She got the privilege of sitting the varsity bench for playoffs and that leaves her hungry for even more. She loves volleyball, especially because Mom knows nothing about it so I can’t coach her at all. In basketball so far this winter, she’s finding her groove on the JV and swings varsity as well. Just before break, she made her first varsity points - 2 free throws - only 998 to go. The rebounds are what she’s really going for in games, and her goal is 1000 in her high school career. Lyndee still loves TV and watching shows as her downtime. Along with Ben, she will be a part of the ensemble cast in the spring musical. She plays trumpet in the band and sings alto in the choir. She and I love to shop together (most of the time) and a consistent question is “Mom, would you let me wear that?” Frequently the answer from me is “Yes, but Dad won’t.” Lyndee worked at Panther Pals with Ben last summer and a little bit over fall break. She’s an excellent student, and though grades and tests can be very stressful, she soldiers on to maintain her 4.0. 

Matt and Amy

Parenting, teaching, and coaching dominate all of our waking moments (and some of our sleeping ones, too). While we ended the year with every day in person schooling, we were hoping that our world would be a bit more normal come fall. School started with a mask mandate which is not what we were hoping for, but we were so happy to just be back with every day in person. We have been determined to do what we need to for the good of our community of learners and their families. Lots of things will continue to fluctuate and we will adjust and do what is asked of us until normalcy, compassion, and common sense return. I have a GREAT class and am thankful for the team of educators and administrators and coaches that I work with every day.  Matt did not coach football this fall, and while he missed it, he was able to accomplish a lot in the woods, go to volleyball games and cross country meets, and hold down the fort for the family. Completing my 14th year of coaching cross country was rewarding and it’s the best when it ends with one of my athletes at the State meet. We are now in the thick of basketball season with Matt again holding down the home responsibilities and me assisting the varsity girls for the 2nd year. We are both looking forward to track and field this year and hoping to replicate the success of last spring. Our girls won the sub-section, placed 5th in the True Team Section and 4th in the Conference. The boys team was an amazing story this past season. They lost 18 talented seniors in the 2020 non-season, and really wanted to leave their own mark in PITF history. And leave it, they did. Matt’s team won the True Team Section, Conference, Sub-Section, Section, and True Team STATE! They are the first team in Pine Island’s history to bring home a State Championship. We are so proud of the athletes and  our amazing coaching staff for their part in this historic season. Of course, I am extremely proud of Matt for earning both Section and State Coach of the Year for Class A track and field. 

Family

We finally were able to visit with friends and family this summer and fall. We were also excited to finally have our SHED (or as brother-in-law Mark calls it - the garage mahal) finished in October.  We broke it in for my 50th birthday party and had a great time celebrating with friends, family, and framily (friends who are like family). 

Pets

Here’s the 2020 rundown–Dash - 10 years old, made a successful bid to become an inside dog, which has drastically reduced his running away and increased his cleanliness.  Tucker  - had a seizure and possibly a stroke in August. He suffered very little and is now laid to rest by Wrigley near the fire pit. Cat #3 - Louie - disappeared again in February and hasn’t been spotted since. Cat #5, Sunny - still loves Gabe and Matt when the mood strikes her, but mostly hangs out under the garage steps. Cat #6, Luna - joined our family when I had a weak moment after losing Tucker. I wanted another dog, but knew that it was too soon and that we needed someone who needed very little care. She’s a delightful kitty and really just wants to be friends with Sunny, who is diabolically opposed to anyone wanting to be her friend, thus lots of hissing and a few swipes at the kitty. 

It’s continued to be such a weird time, and one that has changed us, our families, our communities, and our friends. Especially when parenting teenagers feels like walking a minefield of homework, expectations, and growing independence, I’m reminded that we sometimes need to treat our teenagers like we did when they were toddlers. Almost all angst is temporary and can be solved with food, attention, or sleep. I know that with two of my three, I need to feed them to make them more amenable to anything I’m saying. This is how I find the sweet spot at times. Food, then conversation. We know that the last year or so hasn't been everyone's sweet spot, but we hope you find a moment in each day that feels like it is, or at least that it could be. Happy New Year! 

Love, Matt & Amy, Gabe, Ben, Lyndee, Dash, Sunny, and Luna

Northrop News 2020

Dear Family and Friends, 

We were watching “Home Alone” the other night. Gabe said, “Remember last year when we went to an airport? And there were lots of people there and nobody wore a mask?” Even now we watch tv shows or movies pre-pandemic, it’s a little jarring. Do you see them? They are sharing food! Look at the crowds! There are so many people. No masks?! After returning from our Costa Rica trip with Matt’s brother and parents, we could not have predicted what the rest of our year would be like. 

Gabe

We clearly remember the strong willed tantrums. We recall the times he wouldn’t let us throw anything away and we thought he was a hoarder in training. Now? He’s 17 and his room is neat and organized. He’s still a collector but the focus has shifted from random objects to retro video games (read - games we played in the 80s and 90s) and game systems.  During the Stay Home MN order, he started a hobby business buying up retro video gaming systems, repairing them, and reselling them. It kept him busy and learning about everything that that entailed. He’s inching toward adulthood, and pandemic or not, milestones of growing up were still apparent.  He got his first job - at Matt’s alma mater - Menards.  He’s an order pickup team member, so he gets the online orders for customers and loads things into cars.  He purchased his own vehicle, from our neighbor, with just a little help from us. And we could not be more grateful for his vehicle and his ability to drive his brother and sister to and from school and practices. While distance learning, or hybrid, or whatever model we are currently in - he remains a good student and became a Minnesota Honor Society inductee this fall. He chose NOT to play football, but is currently working hard to get stronger for an anticipated basketball season. Gabe and I had some great adventures this summer, visiting local and metro gaming shops once they reopened and listening to Creepy Pastas together. He’s starting to think about where he might go to college and is taking a few college credits concurrently with HS coursework.  

Ben

Ben is 15 and just passed his driver’s permit test, so we’ll soon have another driver! He got a job this past year working with Panther Pals (or school aged child care). Ben is really great with kids and this summer came home with great stories and, “Mom, listen to this - I made a list called ‘Why I don’t like the morning shift.” The list detailed why each of the kids he was in charge of were crying….all at the same time. My favorite one was, “X is crying because her shoe is wet.” He is gaining great experiences in patience with all kinds of kids. He’ll need that if he still wants to be a teacher. With his earned income, he bought his own computer which Gabe helped him assemble.  Ben loves gaming with his VR (virtual reality) set - another huge purchase - and is currently chasing challenge records in Rec Room (whatever that means). He also appreciates the buying power that comes with having a job, but is annoyed that Mom and Dad still have a say in purchases.  He played football this fall and had a role in the virtual fall play. Ninth grade can be a challenging transition, and distance learning isn’t his favorite, but his grades are good and he’s learning a lot. We recently read The Outsiders together and yes, I still cried at the end. It’s interesting to read it through the lens of parent and teacher and equity now as so much and so little have changed since the book was written in 1962. 

Lyndee

Lyndee will be 14 in just a few short weeks. Just when I think I’ve figured out how to parent a teenage girl, the rules change and what worked yesterday is SO WRONG today. She challenges me to be the best version of myself as her parent and is a consistent reminder that we cannot assume that just because our kids are growing up, that they need us less. She still wants to hang out with me and we definitely enjoy shopping. Since she and I didn’t want to argue each time she wanted some new item of clothing, we negotiated a monthly clothing budget.  Lyndee’s job is to take care of the dogs and just taking that task from us has been a relief.  Lyndee is currently enamored with the game “Among Us” and enjoys being the “Impostor” in the game. She was disappointed in the cancellation of her first track and field season, but did get a chance to do a “little” summer VB and BB. Lyndee loved playing volleyball this fall and is looking forward to basketball starting on January 4th. Lyndee’s favorite foods are fudge bars, ice cream, cereal, and popcorn with chocolate chips. We watched a lot of Full House and Fuller House together. Lyndee enjoyed babysitting and has applied to work at Panther Pals with her brother. She is doing a great job at distance learning and her worry about grades is completely unfounded. 

Matt and Amy

Coaching, teaching, and family. And family. And family. And (we are always together) family. While this year was completely not what we expected, wanted, anticipated, etc., we are ridiculously grateful for our kids, their independence, intelligence, and patience with us. Much to their annoyance, we have been cautious with letting them see friends and we both know how much they miss having a free and active social life. Living in the country was really great for the lockdown period. Our kids have always been used to relying on each other or themselves for entertainment, so it wasn’t too big of a stretch when we would tell them no to hanging out with friends. Even though we limit their screen time far more than they think is necessary, they still occasionally think it’s okay to have our “forced family fun” days. We weren’t able to coach track and field in person last spring, which caused much heartache for us and our athletes. We do know that this adversity will serve us all well in the future, but it didn’t make the loss of the 2020 season any less hard. We both were able to coach this fall with cross country and football. And, that was one thing that made our world seem normal again - even with how different those seasons were structured. As educators, we are permanently tied to a school schedule. I’ve actually been grateful for that through this year, since it’s one thing that has been predictable.  While others remained working from home, we actually got to experience the first day of school rituals with our students. We have changed models a couple of times with 7-12 currently in a full distance model. Since I teach 6th grade, I’ve gotten to teach in person with my students all year, with the exception of one week.  It’s technically a hybrid in person, since I teach half of one group of students and zoom to the other half each period, plus teach to those students who are fully online - all at the same time. Teaching in this way has provided many opportunities for growth and many challenges, but I appreciate that I get to be in person at all. Matt teaches in person right now to 6th graders, but via zoom to his high school classes. Right now, we are looking forward to the start of basketball season for the kids and I actually get to help coach the varsity girls this year after a 10 year hiatus.  Matt and I also are looking forward to a track and field season this spring. 

Family

We desperately miss our friends and family members and hugs and high fives and potlucks and everything else. But, we know we can do anything for a short time. Our deepest gratitude this year goes to the health of our family members - Matt’s 90+ year old grandmas, and our parents are persevering and healthy. Our siblings and nieces and nephews are all healthy and safe as well. 

Pets

Here’s the 2020 rundown–Dash - 9 years old, is making a bid to become an inside dog and only had to be picked up at the humane society once this year due to running away.  Tucker  - 8 years old, started suffering seizures this summer, but is now doing well with medication, has finally lost some weight, but still can’t be an inside dog because he thinks poop is delicious.  Wrigley – after finding out from the vet that he was probably closer to 12 than 10, he diligently guarded us through the stay at home order. Sadly, he left this world due to cancer on the last days of school. We still miss him every day. Cat #3 - Lucy recently reassigned as Louie) - disappeared last fall and showed up again in March! He comes and goes as he pleases and judging by his weight increase, we’re pretty sure he has another family that also feeds him. (Cat #4 - Pepper - went back to his original home and was replaced by Frodo who left with Louie last fall. Frodo remains at large). Cat #5, Sunny - loves Gabe and Matt when the mood strikes her, hates the rest of us and consistently swipes at us when we’ve done nothing remotely to annoy her other than walking by wherever she happens to be. 

It’s just such a weird time in so many, many ways. I have learned that I am grateful for my ability to arrange and rearrange how I think about things. I have learned that you can absolutely be angry and forgiving at the same time. That you can feel grief and joy together. That disappointment can be reframed into motivation. That I can feel scared and comforted in the same experience. That people can disagree and still love each other. We wish you perseverance, harmony, health, and most definitely hope. Through the darkness of the season, peace and stillness can provide an opportunity for reflection and the birth of Jesus can show us hope for what is to come. It won’t be without hardship, disagreement, or loss, and we will be changed when this is over. 

Love, Matt & Amy, Gabe, Ben, Lyndee, Dash, Tucker, Louie,  and Sunny

The Season That Wasn't

Hope seems to me to be the ultimate expression of optimism. Over the course of this crazy spring, people have wondered aloud to me if, by continuing to give workouts and motivation, were we giving false hope to athletes and their families? False hope? Believe me, I am not some Pollyanna who thinks bad things never happen or that  things never feel hopeless. I have known despair and disappointment and grief. And, I would choose hope over those every. single. time. This spring, hope got us out the door to get a workout in. Hope forced us to continue to plan workouts with our coaching staff. Hope gave us smiles and opportunities to see and support athletes from afar. Hope allowed us to create a new normal for a season which just *might* come to fruition. Hope saved us from the depths of despair and disappointment and grief. For a while, at least.

And now, here we are.  The 2020 spring seasons will not happen. The invitationals are off the calendar. The individual goals will not be met. The competition between teammates for a coveted spot on a relay team is simply melted away. The Section True Team championship goal, the State True Team championship goal, the Conference, Sub-Section, Section, and State - all gone. I am wallowing tonight in my own losses. But, I know my losses do not hold a candle to those who don't get the opportunities to compete for their last year - our seniors.  As coaches, we feel grief at the end of each and every season. But then, it's a loss of relationship, of the intensity that that relationship gives us for one season or over the course of many seasons. Now, not only is it the loss of relationships, it's also the devastation of thinking about what could have been and never got the chance to materialize.

Every athlete and coach has defining moments in their lives related to sports. Before this year, I had three.

The first one occurred in my senior year when my team lost the region 3A final in girl's basketball by a slim margin. The buzzer sounded, the other team and their fans exploded in cheers, and I sat on the court with my head in my hands and sobbed. We were so very close to realizing the dream of going to the state tournament in a season where others had already written us off.

The second happened during the Section track and field meet in 2002, long before live results even existed. Our boy's 4x400 team walked across the field toward Matt and me to see if their 2nd place might still qualify them for state. (At that time, only the first place relay team qualified for state.) We had to tell them that they had missed the qualifying standard by .01 seconds. There was nothing we could say to ease that pain.

The third was just two years ago at the State meet. Our senior athlete was running in the 800m finals. We were cheering on the backstretch of the track, feeling the joy and excitement as he sprinted down the homestretch. The runners disappeared behind the awards tent as he was vying for the lead with the eventual champion. We heard the crowd gasp, the runners emerged on the other side of the awards tent, but our runner did not. He had been tripped, got up, and crossed the line in 9th place. The officials ruled that he could rerun the race, alone, at the conclusion of the meet. We didn't want him to regret not trying, so we told him he would do the rerun.  It was emotional as the crowd gave him a standing ovation, but his rightful placing in the top 3 was not to be as his final time would not equal his best. Emotionally and physically exhausted, he crossed the line. Career over.

Each of the previous defining moments still gives me pause. Even the basketball game from 30 years ago. Each moment produces an ache that never will go away and has shaped who I am. I've gotten better at revisiting those moments and sitting with the ache and the sadness. I've gotten more efficient at squashing the what ifs, because now they've become what wasn'ts.  But still, I go back, sit in that space with the ache, cry a little, open to feeling the sadness, breathe in and out and let it go until the next time. That ache isn't a space I avoid anymore, because it's become a tool. When disappointment and despair occur again, as they inevitably do, I think, "Oh yeah, I've felt this before. I've been through this. And I've come through on the other side, maybe not stronger, but different. I can do this."

And now, I have a fourth defining moment. And oh, does it ache.  One of my strengths is empathy, and it's killing me right now. I feel all the feels for our seniors and their parents who just are suffering loss after loss after loss. I feel for the kids I've been coaching since I taught them as students in 6th grade.  I feel for my own kids whose goals for this season won't be realized. I feel for our coaching staff and the volunteers who were beyond compare this year! I feel for my husband who has been talking about THIS season and THIS team since the seniors were 8th graders. 

Grief is funny, and definitely not funny haha.  It's loss. It's disappointment. It's sadness. It's anger. It's despair. This spring, each of these is a response to something that we collectively had absolutely no control over. It's something that's happened or is happening to us, in which we have no say.  The only say we have is in our response.  Trite. I know. The one thing it ISN'T is regret. I often think regret can be even worse than grief. Regret happens when we choose our action or inaction to something with which we are faced.  I will never regret my season kick off speech to the girls. I will never regret the hours in invested in planning this season. I will never regret the meetings and the captain interviews and the planned workouts and the emails and the facebook and twitter posts.  And the athletes? They won't regret coming out for track and field. They will not like the pain and loss and disappointment. But, despite that, the emotional and physical and mental investment that they and their parents and our community has made in track and field will serve them well in the future.  It doesn't feel like it now, and won't for a long time. But this hardship? It will come to look like an opportunity, a gift.

Here's what else this is - a pivot. It isn't a stop sign, a brick wall, or a cliff. It's a pivot. And we choose HOW we pivot and where we go from here. It doesn't mean that we will easily and simply move on. We won't. We will move through, sit in the ache, cry a little (or a lot), and feel all the feels. This hardship is practice for what will come later in our lives - when we will return to the aches we've felt before and know we can get through whatever it is that's going on, because we got through the losses of  2020.

1981/2020

In 2020, it's Friday. The day when teachers usually say, "Phew, we made it through the week!" We celebrate what went well, bemoan what didn't, and start to gear up for the next week. So, when I walked out of my classroom today, I had a minor meltdown. I paused with my bin, filled with what I might need for the next 6 weeks, and just stared with my breath caught in my chest.  This classroom is my sanctuary, my energy, my home, and my work. My students are my why everyday.  My team, my family at work, is filled with the most dependable, innovative, and intelligent people. The administrators I work with? So dedicated, so passionate, so driven, and so good to work with. And, so, when I left today, there was no celebration. There was no relief. There was really only sorrow.

In 1981, in southwestern Minnesota where I grew up, money was tight, especially for a small, rural school district. Just four years before, the district had ended the year in the red - to the tune of over $100,000. And in 1980, by the narrowest of margins, only 30 votes, the school district approved a referendum to build a new athletic complex. Following that approval, between local and state budget shortfalls, the district had to cut almost $200,000. This led to staff layoffs and cuts to programs like language arts, home economics (now called Family and Consumer Sciences), and Physical Education.

In October 1981, in my small town, the teachers' union voted to strike. On Wednesday, October 14th, to coincide with fall break, classes were cancelled indefinitely. My mom was an instructor at the technical college at that time. This meant my mom was on strike, too. I honestly don't remember a lot about that time except the tension. At first, we just had a few days off. And then, a few days more. And then, a few days more. I do recall that this was very polarizing for the community. My friends whose parents weren't teachers, were parrotting their parents in saying, "I don't know why the teachers on on strike. It's greedy, don't they care about the kids?!"

That fall, I was a 10 year old fourth grader. My teacher was a strict, 90 pound, 5 foot tall fearless woman I was scared of. Mostly because once she called me in from recess to talk about a signature I had forged, but that's another story.  My sisters were in 8th and 9th grade respectively.  After 3 weeks, the negotiations were at a standstill. It was getting colder and the strike headquarters, a former gas station at the corner of Prentice and Ninth Avenue, was hopping with teachers unable to teach. And still, teachers were walking the picket line every day.  As supporters (because my mom was on strike as a teacher), we brought coffee, hot chocolate, and cookies to the striking teachers.

It was also cross country season, and my 9th grade oldest sister was a dominant runner who had qualified for the state meet.  On October 31st, she ran in the State Class A race. Our family brought her, our family supported her and cheered her 3rd place finish, and then we brought her home. She could have no contact, or receive any coaching from her coach. But, at that point, we were just so grateful that she would be allowed to compete.

In mid-November, with no settlement in sight, the district made the decision to re-open school with substitute teachers.  The polite word for them was substitute, the impolite word was scab. The substitutes who chose to cross the picket line and teach had a variety of reasons I'm sure.  It could have been money, experience, survival, who knows? I remember my mom telling us that school was starting up again, and for one brief moment, my heart surged. Yes! (I loved school.) I could be back with my friends and going to school which I loved. But, she went on to explain that, because she was a teacher, the three of us could not cross the picket line either. I hung my head and said, yes, I understood. It was solidarity. But, it didn't stop my sadness at not being able to return to school with my friends.

On that first day of school, I stood in our entryway and watched bus #10 turn the corner and head to school without me. That memory is crystallized in my brain. Backing away, I retreated to my room and allowed myself to lose my emotions in a book. The teachers who had school age children decided at that time to start their own school. Card tables were set up in my living room and my teachers and my friends came to my house. I know we had math because we had some worksheets to do. Where they got them, I have no idea. We also visited the planetarium as a "field trip." We had school, but it obviously wasn't the same. In the afternoon, my neighborhood friends would come over and were bursting with how much fun it was with the new teachers. My sister remembers that one of her classmates said, "These teachers are soooo much better than our regular teachers."

These were trying times for the community. Finally, In late November, the school district and the teachers' union reached an agreement. Our district was one of 35 in the state that lived through and learned through a strike that year. 

These last few weeks have been crazy, to say the least. At the same time, it's provided the opportunity for me to reflect on other times in my life where circumstances have been beyond my control. I've seen parallels between myself as a 10 year old student and my own 12 year old students. They have had unknowns, too. They went from spring break to another unexpected week off, while my fellow teachers and I planned for how we would teach them in a way we've never done before. Tonight, I'm sure they are uncertain, but anxious to try whatever we can offer them.

In this story, there are also perpendiculars. I'm sure that when my teachers left their classrooms on October 14th, they expected the negotiations to be over quickly. They didn't pack everything as a finality. They expected to be back quickly, doing what they loved to do. But, because negotiations went poorly, and neither side could come to an agreement, they were not able to return to their classrooms until almost six weeks later.

For myself as a teacher, there's rarely been a year where I haven't either been in school as a student or as a teacher. As it was when I stood in my entryway as a ten year old, tonight I'm faced with what I know and love - school - looking so very, very different. Tomorrow, I start teaching my students in ways I never have. My strengths as a teacher are connections, relationships, stupid jokes, small touches,  and personal interactions. Those things will be hard for me to do through a webcam, headset, and audio in an online forum while I sit in my dining room with a map of Minnesota taped to my china cabinet. But, just as I did in 1981, and my students will do in 2020, we will persevere and be educated by our circumstances and experiences. While my experience as a ten year old was of a polarized community, this definitely is not. We all understand the importance of staying home and making the sacrifices for the greater good. Our community understands that we love our students and that all of us will make it through this time stronger together.

We Are Track and Field

Unprecedented.

Uncertain.

Unusual.

These words have dominated our conversations, our posts, our in person and digital landscapes over the past week.  We will not downplay the seriousness of the pandemic. We’ve not dealt with something exactly like this before. But, we’ve experienced adversity and come out on the other side, and know that our track record for getting through hard things is 100%. 

We Are Track and Field. 

And, on an albeit smaller scale, we’ve done this before. We’ve stood in the rain and the snow and the wind. We’ve run in downpours. We’ve landed on a soaked pole vault pit and celebrated clearing a height, despite our discomfort. Our shoes have been soaked and dirty from landing in a drenched sand pit. We’ve slipped and fallen in a hurdle race, whether the track was wet or dry. We have entered the throws circle in a puddle, slipped past the toe board and scratched an amazing attempt. We’ve picked up our shots and discs, wiped them down with towels, and thrown again. We’ve high jumped right into the bar, or missed the pit altogether. We’ve taken water during races in oppressive heat. We’ve slowed down, tucked in behind another teammate or competitor on the backstretch to shelter from a driving wind. We’ve surged to pass someone, only to get caught right at the finish.  We’ve won big and lost big. 

See? We’ve already done this. Every competition and practice has provided us the experiences of frustration, exhaustion, and failure. But, it’s also provided us the experiences of joy, laughter, teamwork, and victory. 

We don’t know the outcome of our season, if we’ll get to practice together or compete. But, whatever happens, our track record for getting through hard things is 100%. 

Unburdened.

Unafraid.

Undefeated.

We’ve got this. We Are Track and Field.